Triple-A Minesweeper

(minesweeper.mikelacher.com)

266 points | by robin_reala 4 hours ago

45 comments

  • Toutouxc 5 minutes ago
    I was hoping for the thing where you play through like half of the game and only then it shows you the title against a dramatic vista.
  • devin 2 hours ago
    So good.

    Maybe lean into some of the metal gear solid dialogue by having a long back and forth about "What's a mine?" "What do you mean 'mark a mine'?" "How do I know when I'm done?" etc.

    • mkobit 2 hours ago
      I really enjoy this trope. The "Zelda Ocarina of Time if it were a modern game" series has the MGS style discussion, and the whole series is incredible.

      Here is the forest temple video which is a short sample of what to expect: https://youtu.be/KC656o7_zVk

    • dormento 45 minutes ago
      "Sweeper, press the X button to mark a mine."

      "X... button?"

      "Focus, Sweeper! Sweeper? SWEEPEEEER!"

  • grumbel 1 hour ago
    There is also the classic "Minesweeper - The Movie"[1]

    [1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHY8NKj3RKs

  • NSUserDefaults 1 hour ago
    Nice but the logos are skippable, which is not realistic.
    • LugosFergus 45 minutes ago
      Also, since it's an Unreal game, it's missing long load times, camera jitter, frame spikes, and dynamic resolution constantly kicking in.
  • fidotron 1 hour ago
    But I didn't need to install a publisher specific launcher to run it.
    • ravenstine 1 hour ago
      And then be forced to download a 42GiB update.
  • m_w_ 11 minutes ago
    Great parody - very "Focus, M"-esque. Often, it feels that we've lost sight of "If it's not fun, why bother".
  • theroadnotbacon 1 hour ago
    I was absolutely hoping to see production babies in the credits. Can’t win ‘em all.
    • jameshart 59 minutes ago
      No pets credited either.
  • xbar 1 hour ago
    I was angry at the wasted 30 seconds of opening licensed 3rd party software listings, but I stayed through to the end of the credits roll, laughing until I cried.

    This is Art.

    • nottorp 1 hour ago
      I think the opening logo sequence is too short. Also it's missing agreement to 2-3 EULAs that you have to scroll down all the way for the accept button to get enabled. And the epilepsy warning. And the disclaimer that it's all a work of fiction.
      • adamanonymous 31 minutes ago
        Also missing the redirect to your browser to connect to Epic Games and create a SweeperPro account with 2FA
      • jameshart 58 minutes ago
        Failed certification because it didn’t warn you not to turn off when the save icon is spinning.
  • jordigh 18 minutes ago
    icymi, we can also do this with Mario https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMh_APo2Xss
  • lapetitejort 2 hours ago
    Missing:

    Sidequest to sweep 10 mines.

    Achievement after sweeping 5 mines

    The yellow diamond is nice but what if I don't notice the diamond? I need a colored scent trail leading from my cursor to the yellow diamond, and a pinging noise when my cursor is near a mine

    Mocapped mines

    Jack Quaid

    $70

    • jandrese 1 hour ago
      There should be additional audio logs you can find under some squares that provide snippits of backstory.
      • lapetitejort 1 hour ago
        This is minesweeper 33. I'n out sweeping mines and I ran across one that looks different than the others. I'll keep investigating while mine sweeping. I'm recording this 30 second clip onto an entire recording device with a 64gb SD card. I'll leave it on this rock for others to find. Don't worry, I have 11 other devices to record my short messages. Wait, the mine, it's glowing! I can't--
    • rf15 1 hour ago
      Sorry, did you mean Achievement for Starting the Game for the First Time?
      • buran77 1 hour ago
        "Only 7.89% of gamers unlocked this".
  • larrydag 13 minutes ago
    I love the parody. Is this a treatise on modern game development? I hope so.
  • MisterMunchkin 2 hours ago
    Please expand this into a full open-world minesweeping game
  • LunicLynx 1 hour ago
    Needs:

    - Checkpoints after each mine

    - DLC for rounded corners

    • thesuitonym 1 minute ago
      The DLC is a hat for John Sweeper.
  • magnat 29 minutes ago
    Felix Varga and Johanna Kowalski (Online Services Engineers) must have done a really good job - with all the traffic from the HN front page login servers didn't go down and queue was almost instant.
  • xoxxala 1 hour ago
    10/10 story. I look forward to the forthcoming motion picture adaptation from Skydance directed by Michael Bay.
    • test6554 1 hour ago
      After Singapore, there just wasn't any choice.
  • franze 2 hours ago
    so, in case if you like minesweeper and doom ... https://dreadsweeper.franzai.com/
  • donkey_brains 2 hours ago
    So good. Looking forward to level 2 so we can find out what happened in Singapore.
    • jameshart 56 minutes ago
      That will be coming in the first DLC in a few months, delayed because it is being developed by a new team after the original development studio was bought by Activision, retasked to making a mobile solitaire game, then laid off.
  • derac 19 minutes ago
    What no 30 minute shaders compiling sequence?
  • 361994752 2 hours ago
    the non-stopping narration makes it so hard to actually sweep the mines....
    • nvme0n1p1 1 hour ago
      Don: Sounds like you're getting rusty. The Sweeper I knew in Singapore would never have choked like this from just a little background noise.
    • MitPitt 2 hours ago
      Focus, M.
  • isoprophlex 2 hours ago
    No lootboxes?
    • ravenstine 1 hour ago
      There aren't even any skins I can buy with my mom's credit card.
  • jandrese 1 hour ago
    I like the part where it doesn't even matter if you hit a mine, you are on this train ride regardless of what you do.
  • wredcoll 1 hour ago
    That was a great parody, but how much of those effects still worked even though you knew it was coming? The fade ins, blurring the outsides, the emotional voice talking to you... it definitely raised my interest more than just opening minesweeper!

    I mean, it doesn't last very long without something else going on, but there is a reason.

    • thaumasiotes 1 hour ago
      > That was a great parody, but how much of those effects still worked even though you knew it was coming? The fade ins, blurring the outsides, the emotional voice talking to you...

      Worked?

      The game takes a very long time to load. This is funny, but not desirable in an actual game.

      There is voiceover dialogue as you start. You can listen to it, but at some point you'll want to start playing the game.

      There is an indicator telling you which square to clear next. I ignored this for several reasons:

      - I want to know if you're compelled to follow it (you aren't);

      - It's pointing to the wrong square;¹

      - Following it would defeat the entire purpose of playing the game.

      Dialogue continues as you play. But you can't listen to it because your mind is occupied. Following the indicator would solve that problem...

      ¹ There is a game you can find called Hexcells that is supposed to be an "improved" version of minesweeper. The "improvements" are two:

      1. It's a hex grid, not a square grid.

      2. In general, there is only one hex known to be clear at any given time. This means that the structure of the game is that you mindlessly reveal whichever tile you just gained information about rather than suffering under any obligation to think about what you can tell from the board.

      I'm not sure why this was supposed to be an improvement; the only effect is to remove the entire puzzle aspect from a puzzle game. But hey, Steam reviews are "overwhelmingly positive". https://store.steampowered.com/app/265890/Hexcells/

      • johnnyanmac 1 hour ago
        >First, the game takes a very long time to load. This is funny, but not desirable in an actual game.

        In unrealistic fashion, you can in fact mash through the license logos once you load in. So thr game itself doesn't actually take long at all to boot up on a technical level; the delays were a design choice.

  • NSUserDefaults 1 hour ago
    And which half of the staff gets fired day after release?
  • fHr 2 minutes ago
    Lmao
  • forgotTheLast 1 hour ago
    Where do I enter my credit card info for the Season Pass and the special operator skin?
  • dllrr 1 hour ago
    That's hilarious. Spot on.
  • ixo 1 hour ago
    Sweep (2026)
  • Razengan 2 hours ago
    Pac-Man as a Modern AAA Game: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OaoUVVD-hUc
    • kennywinker 1 hour ago
      I should follow those pac-dots...
  • avereveard 1 hour ago
    Not even a dlc and cosmetics?
  • UtahDave 2 hours ago
    This is hilarious
  • jjmarr 58 minutes ago
    The ending needed to force you to click on a mine so you die in the cutscene lmao.
  • cckolon 1 hour ago
    There might be a mine here
  • ReptileMan 1 hour ago
    The part where the subtitles hide the mines is the best for me. Also talk with Ubisoft - they make AAAA games.
  • etchalon 2 hours ago
    I laughed way way way too hard
  • duhballs 1 hour ago
    Needs Debra Wilson
  • b3lvedere 1 hour ago
    That was awesome
  • viccis 1 hour ago
    Damn I didn't even have to Press Start to begin
  • bbeonx 1 hour ago
    omg this is brilliant i was IMMEDIATELY tilting my face off
  • bentt 2 hours ago
    Art
  • serf 55 minutes ago
    now add a kernel level rootkit and a monthly subscription which guarantees a set amount of loot-boxes a month.
  • IshKebab 11 minutes ago
    lol perfect execution. I cracked up with the smiley face lip sync.
  • justmaris 4 hours ago
    This is fun.
  • peterramsing 2 hours ago
    [dead]
  • iwontberude 2 hours ago
    [dead]